Sahar Sound: Feeling Trapped Or Stuck? Ready For Freedom?

Ever feel trapped, like you have absolutely no choice? As though you're completely stuck in this addiction/ relationship/ job or life? In this blog, I offer assistance in freeing yourself from this "prison".
First, I invite you to consider that your present experience is a result of the way you think about yourself. Swami Muktananda said "The world is as you see it". Said another way: "You are the way you see yourself".

How Did I Get Stuck?

As very young children we made significant decisions in relationship to the main authorities in our lives (generally, our parents). These decisions were based upon the degree to which we felt loved and accepted as the unique and beautiful beings we were. Each decision was a "brush stroke" in the creation of a "picture" that we painted. This "picture" became our own self image.

With parents who were in conflict, we may have made decisions about how to behave in order to feel safe. These decisions lead us away from our natural spontaneity, to believing that we had to determine our life's course based on perceived circum-stances. Eventually these decisions made up our outlook on life. From this outlook,(or self-written "manual" for our life) we have learned to strategize and prepare to defend/ hide/ oppress/ or seduce and manipulate people and circumstances. The extent to which we identify with our "manual" (disallowing other possibilities of perception) is the extent to which we are invested in or attached to specific outcomes. This leads to a life of expectation and disappointment.

In our first few years of life, we shifted from our natural state of being internally based and pro-active (experienced as "Us as Life"), to being externally based and re-active (experienced as "Us separate from Life" or even "Us against Life"). Consequently we frequently become complacent, living out an existence of struggle.

Until we recognize this "manual", it will dictate our every thought, word and action. It will remain subjective and we will never question it's validity or whether we could choose differently from it. Fortunately, the more aware of this "manual" we are, the more objective it becomes, and the less influence it has over our choices.

Gaining awareness of the "manual" is key. How do we do this?

In a previous blog, I referred to the Vedantic practice of "Not this, not this". The practice is one of recognizing all that is temporary (including the "manual"). Whatever remains is of a permanent nature and therefore, the Truth of who we are. It's about identifying our attachments and investments. To do this become aware

We can't command our love, but we can our actions.
Arthur Conan Doyle

Wisdom, Love, Our

It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.
Arthur Conan Doyle

Wisdom, Been, Things

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
Arthur Conan Doyle
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/a/arthur_conan_doyle.html#ShCEQ1WBCbvcXIyk.99

of the areas in your life where you want results. . The area of relationships may be the easiest to recognize where we are invested in results. Take a moment to reflect:...
.
Think of a person in your life and ask yourself the following questions:

Are you in this relationship to get a certain kind of attention?
What needs are you attempting to get met in this relationship?
Are you in a power struggle with this person?
Are you making them your "project"?...meaning are you invested in them changing or "growing"?
If so, what do you tell yourself will be your reward when they change or grow into the person you want?
Do you feel yourself to be a better person when you're with them?
Are you are looking for a certain kind of permission from them (for instance, permission to engage in a certain behavior or activity)?

Now, think of an activity in your life and ask these relevant questions:

Are you engaged in this activity because of what others have told you you should do?
To what extent is this activity an escape? From what or whom?
Do you experience joy, vitality, peace, or love when engaged in this?
Or is it a promise of some later reward?.
Are you engaged in this activity because you are wanting for something / someone to change?
Are you engaged in this because it's tradition?
Are you engaged in this activity out of a belief that by doing it you are more deserving?

This is a process of recognizing all "self-generated" thoughts. Thoughts born out of the belief that you are separate from life, alone in the world, misunderstood, and consequently, that life is struggle. When you recognize these thoughts and no longer give them your attention, you then hear "fresh" thoughts, not based on reaction, belief, or history. There is a deep peace and joy that accompanies these "fresh" thoughts.

One teacher of mine said, "become aware of this "manual", don't try to change it, don't even try to minimize it. Just let it be." When I asked his awareness of the influence of his "manual" in his life, he said "Its influence is like a fart in a distant galaxy"! He lived a life of great inner freedom. He was fun too!

OSHO ON WAR

'A man of peace is not a pacifist, a man of peace is simply a pool of silence.
He pulsates a new kind of energy into the world, he sings a new song.
He lives in a totally new way his very way of live is that of grace, that of prayer, that of compassion.
Whomsoever he touches, he creates more love-energy.
The man of peace is creative.
He is not against war, because to be against anything is to be at war. He is not against war, he simply understands why war exists.
And out of that understanding he becomes peaceful.
Only when there are many people who are pools of peace, silence, understanding, will the war disappear.'

OSHO, from: 'Zen: The Path of Paradox, vol II'